best-of

 

“OAB”

best of weird

As I drove her home, she suddenly looked at me in terror and said, “I’m so sorry!” — which was promptly followed by the sound of her full bladder erupting all over my passenger seat.

—oneunfortunateguy

Aftermath: Oddly enough, I didn’t feel compelled to ask her out again.


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“The lease”

best of weird

After two years together, his lease was up for renewal. I suggested he and I move in together. His response: “You want to live with me and my roommates?”

—Mel

Aftermath: It lasted another six months before I realized he honestly and truly wasn’t in this relationship for the long haul.


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“Hooters T-shirt”

best of chemistry

When I was 19, I dated this country boy while I was home from college for the summer. I knew it wouldn’t work when he showed up for a date one night in a Hooters T-shirt, cut-off shorts and high-top shoes. Then we went to a gravel pit and made out in the back of his pickup.

—Summer

Aftermath: It was fun while it lasted (about a week), but we would never have made it past that “What does it all mean?” conversation.


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“My arm fell asleep”

best of chemistry

When we were in bed spooning one night, and my arm fell asleep underneath her. As I went to slide my arm out, she turned around and said, “What’s wrong with you? Don’t you love me?” She rolled over and bawled for the next hour, inconsolable.

—Michael

Aftermath: Two months later, we were through. After my arm fell asleep, there was a constant boo-hoo over everything. I couldn’t take it.


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“Lord of the Rings”

best of clashes

He cried during the last “Lord of the Rings” movie.

—Kelly

Aftermath: He cried when I broke up with him, too.


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