best-of

 

“Dirty downloads”

best of manners

We had been out on a few dates and I wanted him to meet my best friend and her boyfriend. We all decided to meet at a nice restaurant. Everything was going fine until he opened his phone and started showing my best friend all the porn he had downloaded.

—Jillian

Aftermath: It was over two weeks later.


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“Plan Eh?”

best of chemistry

After sex, I thought it would be a good idea to take Plan B and made my boyfriend go get it from the pharmacy. Upon his return, he told me not to take it and that having a baby would be fun. Or if not, he hoped we could rent one for the day.

—Erica

Aftermath: Two months later….I realized his incessant need for marriage and children after 4 months, at age 24, was a little too much for me. The kicker? I broke up with him and he claimed he had been planned on breaking up with me all along.


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“Spielberg’s Purple Jaws”

best of clashes

During the 2009 Golden Globes there was a tribute to Steven Spielberg. He said, “Spielberg didn’t direct Jaws.” I said “What?!” He said, “He may have produced it, but he didn’t direct it.”

Pause. “He didn’t direct The Color Purple, either.”

—Dirks

Aftermath: I moved out.

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“Family Man”

best of secrets!

I was dating a guy long distance and we had visited a couple of times. He came up and told me he had something important to tell me. It turns out that he had sexually molested two of his own children. His therapist told him that she wouldn’t let him out of the state again unless he told me everything.

–Jen

Aftermath: He got mad that I didn’t want to start a family with him (after three dates). We haven’t spoken since.


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“Jealous Anymore”

best of weird

Two days after my best guy friend passed away, my boyfriend said, “Now I probably won’t feel jealous anymore.”

—Jessica

Aftermath: “Probably?” He’s dead, why would he feel jealous of a dead person??? A week after that he got mad at me for continuing to mourn the loss of my friend and said that I should be over it by now. Then he proceeded to call my mom and tell her he was worried I was going to hurt myself. WHAT THE HELL!?!?! I stopped talking to him that night and haven’t since. He was an ass anyway…


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