He gave me a mix tape with some retarded Boyz II Men song on it because all girls like Boyz II Men. Then he put on “Don’t Cry” by Guns n’ Roses but apologized, on the tape, because it might be too heavy. I thought, “Does this guy does know me at all?” I think he would have spontaneously combusted if I told him I wished he put the Violent Femmes on it instead.

—Cindy

Aftermath: He went back to where he came from across the country and, thank god, things fizzled on their own.

As I waited patiently for her to get ready, her kitten started nuzzling me. I picked the cat up and realized the poor thing had one eye. Then, my date came in, grabbed the cat from me and threw it violently onto the kitchen table, where it struggled to catch itself on the slippery surface before falling off the edge and landing on the hardwood floor.

—Leon

Aftermath: I rushed our date and broke up with her the next weekend.

I was out of work and my friend was paying all the rent himself and providing food for the entire household. My girlfriend thought it would be a fantastic idea to belittle him and call him pathetic because of his hobbies (which were the same as mine).

—Jezzter

Aftermath: Three months later, I ended it.

When after he took a shower and shaved, etc…I thought he smelled only of chemicals, and it made me puke a little.

—CC

Aftermath: We divorced 2 years later.

He cried because his favorite band, System of a Down, broke up. He got angry at me, because I wasn’t being emotionally supportive.

—Cynthia

Aftermath: We broke up a week later, and he still holds a grudge…four years later.