One day she was teasing me by trying to nibble on my d*ck through my boxers. She was successful. Upon going to the bathroom, I realized she broke a blood vessel. I told her she had to drop everything and leave.

—Deacon

Aftermath: 2 years later I still see her everyday and we are good friends…She has no idea what she did.

It was a blind date. I got in the car and he started berating me for not thanking him for the flowers – which I didn’t receive. He called and yelled at the flower shop for not completing the delivery. At dinner, he yelled at the waitress when she stopped by to take our drink order. I begged off the rest of the date and he took me home. Before parting ways he handed me a gift bag containing banana scented bubble bath and said, “I was thinking we could try it out. Banana is a very sensual scent.”

—Vee

Aftermath: No bubble bath for him that night. I tossed the stuff out as soon as I got in the door. I never spoke to him again.

I thought I’d show around the new girl in school. Needless to say she called me a short time later, and we were messing around but I had no condom so she proceeded to give me the best BJ known to man. Afterwards, I made the mistake of telling a friend, who told her, “I hear you suck good.” Great line…

—Robert

Aftermath: She told me that my friend ruined all chances for me in trying to experience her greatly aquired skills for himself. Afterwards she was passed around the school, and I kinda felt lucky I was first in line. BTW STD FREE

I knew it was over when I was two weeks late and finally worked up the courage to tell him I thought I was pregnant. He acted supportive until after I took the test and found out I wasn’t, when he began yelling at me for being “inconsiderate” for not waiting until after I took the test to tell him anything so he wouldn’t have been so scared. He then explained that he needed to “spend some time with his family after this traumatizing event” and went and smoked with his brother, not even asking how I was feeling.

—NotaMommy

Aftermath: As soon as he he left his house that night (he lived with his parents) I went there with a friend and moved out everything I had been keeping there.

After many months of unsatisyfying, infrequent sex because he had almost zero sex drive, I found him masturbating while having cyber sex with another character on World of Warcraft. This was after almost 3 months of no sex because he “wasn’t interested”.

—Amethyst

Aftermath: Meet another man who’s now my husband that doesn’t trade real women for pixellated ones (that are probably played by men anyway).