I broke up with my ex after I invited him to my family’s 4th of July vacation and he began to pout because we were being too loud and he wanted to go to bed. It was 9 p.m. on the 4th of July.

—Frances

Aftermath: Just before he left, he accused me of cheating with one of my friends. I wasn’t, but I’m now engaged to him and he doesn’t pout.

My girlfriend wanted to drop by. Told her I was playing poker with friends that night and to come the next day. She showed up anyway. Tried to include her in the game, but it was hopeless. She sat out of later rounds, but proceeded to grope me from behind. She nearly had my shirt off in front of eight friends when I took her outside my apartment and told her to go home. She ran crying and phoned ten minutes later to break up with me. I ignored future calls.

—MJ

Aftermath: Six months later, she phoned to say she was getting married. I wished her the best. She told me the precise location and time of the wedding. I heard later this was to encourage me to pull some “Graduate”-style last-minute intervention, and she was disappointed I didn’t. She broke up with her husband a year later. She’s apparently a bit of a nutjob. Dodged a bullet.

When he told me (a girl) that he’d just cheated on me with another man.

—toobad

Aftermath: We broke up and it’s probably for the best.

He told me it would be nice to “F” someone beautiful and intelligent and he wasn’t talking about me…

—Tammy

Aftermath: Splitsville

My cheap boyfriend didn’t want to buy a car and wanted to use mine while I could take public transit to work. I knew it was over when he said, “I know it is your car, but I’d like it to be OUR car.”

—mvan

Aftermath: He also wanted me to move out of my apartment to move closer to his new job so it would be convenient to share rent. We broke up shortly after.