My wife came home from working at a truck stop as a waitress. We talked about her day and then I started kissing her and getting frisky. She was all excited so, as she stood in front of, me I undid her pants and started to pull them off. I got her pants to her knees when something wet landed on my hand, I looked down and to my horror I saw a used rubber.

—Randy

Aftermath: I got up, packed her stuff and threw her out and 3 months later I was divorced.

At our wedding reception, he pulled me aside chewed me out and called me slut because my wedding dress showed too much cleavage, even though the lace went from top of cleavage to neck.

—Young and Dumb

Aftermath: Stayed married for 10 years with out being able to wear shorts, makeup, tank tops or any type of v-neck shirt without being called a slut. Guess I’m a slow learner but happy as hell when I could finally wear shorts in 100 degree weather.

On our second date, she informed me she was pregnant. Mind you, we didn’t do a damn thing. After I pointed this out, she claimed it to be an Immaculate Conception. And I’m quoting her, “I might be the next Virgin Mary.” I just walked out of the restaurant.

—jloco

Aftermath: It was high school. Got some jackass to date her and the live in some trailer park. Oh and she was never pregnant, just stupid.

My wife and I were sitting around drinking with a bunch of friends. The subject came up over how many times in the last week each couple had sex. My wife went into deep thought, counting on her fingers and then blurted out a number that was more than twice what I had come up with. After I quizzically mentioned my number the look on her face and her whispered “Oh S#!t” was all that needed to be said. The party broke up with everyone apologizing to me.

Aftermath: I now call her my ex-wife. She is almost 40, preggers and misses me. Ahhhh… too bad.

We had been looking at homes for a few months and finally found one. After talking about the mortgage, she wouldn’t co-sign the house with me. Less than week of moving in to the house together, the nude photographs she sent to her online gaming friends showed up in my email inbox.

—Scott

Aftermath: Moved out a month later, and never talked to her again.