It was over when I found out that he was offering our bathtub to a very good friend, saying, “Tomorrow is good, Jules is gonna be at work…”

Good thing she told me…

—Jules

Aftermath: It ended right there after 4 years. He tried to make up and even called my landlord, my mom and my best friend!

We were engaged. One night he went to a party. He didn’t come back until 8 the next morning. He said he was too drunk to make it home, and I understood. Three weeks later he tells me that he ended up sleeping next to some girl, but nothing happened. When I asked why he didn’t initially tell me, he claimed he was too scared that I’d be mad.

Aftermath: I found out he was cheating on me. I ended up dating an awesome guy, and we’re still together four years later.

My ex is in a shitty marriage with an abusive woman.

He still calls me. I never answer.

Came home one evening to be with my girl Jill. She left me later that night because I woke up screaming.

—Some Guy

Aftermath: I wish I didn’t lose my right hand by cutting it off during my sleep. (Joke obviously)

My best friend took my virginity. We were secretly a couple for the next five months. He texted me saying he wanted to take a break. Three days later he drunk dialed me to tell me it was over, he loved me, but wanted to f*ck this hot chick at his gym.

—Plan-B

Aftermath: We are still best friends but I am still in love with him. I hate the fugly pig whore from the gym who is now his girlfriend. He tells me he loves me every day.

We dated for two years, and then he told me he didn’t love me “as much” anymore. Instead of cutting my losses there, I decided the smart decision was to have my soul crushed more in a “booty call” 3rd year. Finally, after I had done 3 years of his homework, he decided that he “didn’t care about me at all anymore” and dumped me.

—IvyLeagueSmartie

Aftermath: We haven’t talked for a month, but greet each other awkwardly in run-ins on the street and at the library.

I still haven’t moved on, but I think he’s dating someone new already. I hope she’s smart enough to do his homework too…