He gave me a full-body massage, me naked, him naked. I gave him massage; I jumped onto his back, naked. He told me he didn’t want to lose his temple recommend. WTF?

—Is it just me?

Aftermath: I told him that we should just be friends – just not the kind that ever talk or see each other.

The first time I decided to go all the way with him, he had a hard time raising the flag. After a disappointing performance (he thought he did a great job), he didn’t want me to leave and wrapped his legs and arms around me. I tried waiting until he went to sleep, but he woke up when I tried to sneak out, and I had to tell him I was going to the bathroom before he’d let me go.

—Swinging Single

Aftermath: I told him that I was so wracked with guilt about sleeping with a married man, even though they were separated, but that I hoped we could still be friends.

The rules for the first date: no french kissing, no touching. A hug was ok.  The rules for the second date? If I am still around after 1 month, we can have sex. (“Are you kidding?” I say.) Bam – 2 months. (“You serious?”) Bam – 3 months.

—Ken

Aftermath: I told her I wouldn’t last 3 months. She said, “Your loss, isn’t this worth it ?” Shook her BIG TITS. Told her at 50 years of age, they definitely would not stand up to my rules.

After we had 3 kids she got lazy. She lays around the house and yelling orders…just like her MOTHER!

—TJ

Aftermath: I’m waiting for my youngest son to turn 18! 15 years to go!!!!

She always bitched and complained about “the father of her child” so I assumed she was never married or was recently divorced. After 6 months of casual dating I found out that she was separated, not divorced or an unwed mother as I had thought. She told me “we need to talk about this” when I asked her if she was married. That conversation never happened.

—Bill

Aftermath: Her husband found who I was and tried to run me down in a supermarket parking lot. I shared this with several friends and family members in case anything ever happens to me.