He wanted me to call him Cliff Daddy in bed. He even had it tattooed on him.

—EW

Aftermath: Couldn’t stop laughing, broke up afterward.

He was a blind date. He called ahead to tell me we were going “some place nice” for dinner, so I dressed accordingly – cute dress, heels, the works. He showed up with flowers and candy! But it was all downhill from there.

He had welded his car doors shut, and the only way to get in was to hop through the window.  “Someplace nice” was Long John Silvers, and he spent the hour we were there talking about his Snap-On tools.

—Teleute

Aftermath: I thanked him for dinner, deflected his attempt to kiss me, and asked him to please not call me again. The friend who set us up was pissed at me for months.

I helped her get through being raped by one of her family members. As soon as everything began to go back to normal, she said she didn’t have a “passionate love for me.”

—The Coach

Aftermath: She was a drama queen. I bet none of it even happened. Pretty sure there was another guy the entire time.

I’m not a huge fan of PDA, but I was expecting a kiss goodbye at the airport. He didn’t even sit next to me. And he definitely didn’t kiss me goodbye. I’m not sure why he even showed up at the airport.

—

Aftermath: Worst kiss I never had.

After a long day at work I was chillin’ and watching TV with her. An ice cream commercial came on. She asked me to get it for her NOW… I said that I just want to watch the show…and she starts a screamfest.

—Dee Zee

Aftermath: Adios!