His eyes rolled back into his head if he experienced something pleasurable. I could get him to do it by scratching the top of his head. At one point, after he had been acting distant for a few weeks, I started scratching his head and his eyes rolled back for a few seconds before they snapped back into place—he looked at me and asked abruptly, “What are you doing?” All I could do was let my hand drop and respond, “Nothing.”

—Leah

Aftermath: I think we had our “spending some time apart” talk the next morning and officially broke up a few weeks later.

He said he’d marry me when he bought a house. We looked at about 20 houses—none were good enough. He opted for buying a car instead. I knew right then that he’d never be able to commit to me. I dumped him a week later, on Tax Day.

—Julia

Aftermath: He was married within a year to someone else. From what I hear, it’s not a happy union either.

He had dilapidated purple loofah gloves hanging in his shower. When I asked him if they belonged to his daughter, he said, “No, they’re mine. I have to keep my skin smooth.” The end.

—Angus La Rue

Aftermath: I broke up with him on the spot and cried my eyes out all the way home.

We went out on the lake and, after his first dip in the water, I noticed the mole on his chest had reacted to the cold. Triple Nipple is a deal-breaker.

—Jillian

Aftermath: The moment we hit land, I was out.

I realized that only thing I’d miss about him was the ribs he’d make.

—Marla

Aftermath: Broke it off about a week later.