I should have realized it was doomed when he couldn’t figure out a thermostat because it was too complicated.

—Anna

Aftermath: We dragged on another year, part of which was spent a half continent apart. If we’d stayed in the same house, we’d have split by Christmas.

We went through the drive thru window at fast food place and he ordered a fish sandwich and pronounced it the “fill-ett o’ fish.” He wasn’t joking and I knew he was just too stupid to continue the relationship.

—Alexa

Aftermath: I broke up with him a couple weeks later and it only lasted that long because the sex was good.

I wasn’t really sure how much he liked me, and when he told me one day that his uncle had died and he couldn’t have plans because he was going to the funeral, I felt suspicious. I pretty much knew it was over when I resorted to calling a bunch of funeral homes in the region and asking if they were having a service for “Mr. So and So.”

—Jen

Aftermath: It turns out the uncle did die, as I talked to the funeral home where the service was taking place. But my instincts were right; the guy broke things off a few weeks later.

He said he’d “rather lose a finger than go bald.”

—Nicole

Aftermath: He was already going bald. I should have known something was wrong when he had to sleep with a hat on. We dated for two years, long distance.

A few weeks into the relationship I was making tea for both of us. When I asked him how he liked it, he made a call home to his Mom to ask how many spoons of sugar to put in.

—deb

Aftermath: Lasted a few weeks longer but ended after a discussion about the way his Mom thought I should act and dress. 22 years later, he still lives with his Mom.