She gave me blue balls as a Valentine’s gift.

— Andrew

Aftermath: Still blue

On on our first date as he drove around looking for a parking spot, an elderly couple was slow getting out of their spot, and he started screaming and swearing at them about how slow old people are. He finally gave up on them and proudly pulled into a handicapped parking space as he showed me that he has his “Granny’s” parking tag that he can use.

— MLJ

Aftermath: I was so embarrassed to be seen with this guy that I ended it quickly after that.

After six years of marriage, two of which saw me as an associate pastor, she announced that she is, and had been a practicing Wiccan, complete with a witch name and a regularly scheduled meeting place for her coven.

— cluelessinohio

Aftermath: Three years after our divorce, my girlfriend cut her finger and joked that “maybe there’s a curse on me!”

I decided to do the most romantic thing I could think of for our 20th anniversary – a surprise wedding renewal. Friends and relatives from all over the country attended. I proposed on one knee in front of everyone, told her I loved her, and renewed our vows. Everyone cried … everyone but her.

After we got home from the service she said, “How DARE you do something like this??? Don’t SPEAK to me again.”

— WV Jim

Aftermath: It took me 11 more years, but I finally asked her for a divorce. Oddly enough, we now get along better than we ever have.

I lost my “virginity” to a guy who performed the entire act to completion, never realizing he has never actually “in.”

— Dawn

Aftermath: I broke up with him the next day and he drove to my house and handed me a very angry letter which stated that girls who break up with a guy after what we did get a VERY bad reputation. He ended up with the bad reputation. Amateur!