He cheated on me with his old babysitter.

— Lisa

Aftermath: Ewww.

She wanted me to dress up in her father’s uniform and punish her for getting a “C” on her report card.

— Mr.E

Aftermath: I left and haven’t talked to her since.

I found out that she was an escort.

— live and learn

Aftermath: Need I say more?

I received a call from my son’s high school principal.

— thp

Aftermath: He informed me it was against school policy for my husband to pick up a senior cheerleader for lunch dates.

My brother got hit by a car and when I called to tell her, she responded “Ok and….”

– Heath

Aftermath: Her favorite show was on.