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“Or What”

chemistry

I started dating a friend and five minutes into our first date, he looked at me and asked, “So… we gonna make out now or what?” He also invited himself to spend the night at my place that same night. I told him that I’d rather he didn’t, as I had to get up early for work, but he insisted. When I got blankets and a pillow from the closet for him, he rolled his eyes and said, quite peevishly, “So I guess I’m sleeping on the couch, then?”

—Jenna

Aftermath: I broke up with him a week later. He still tells people that when I “figure out what I want,” we’ll be together. It’s been almost four years since that first date.


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“MIA”

best of secrets!

I found out he had gone MIA because he had been in jail. I stupidly took him back only to have him go MIA…again.

Kate

Aftermath: I quit trying to pursue the “relationship,” or lack thereof. Years later, I also found out the entire time we had been datinghe was engaged.


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“Guinea Pig Killer”

best of weird

My boyfriend told me he lost my guinea pig while playing with it. Thirty minutes later, we found it behind the couchdead. A week later, I forgave him and he bought me a new one. Not even a month later he accidentally killed that one too and stuck it in a trash bag next to a can of raviolis that he made 2 minutes after the poor animal died. And this was not the weirdest thing about him either…

Secret

Aftermath: I went to the bathroom to cry and when I came out, I dumped him! He is now known as Guinea Pig Killer.


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“Resident Advisor”

clashes

I was dating one of the resident advisors at my dorm. The night before summer break, he ditched me and went out drinking with his friends. I got mad and drank with my friends too. He came back and yelled at me for it, threatening to write me up while he was still drunk.

Savannah Mary

Aftermath: We stayed together online for about a month after this.


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“Better Left Unsaid”

best of secrets!

When boyfriend slept with my best friend over 10 times and thought it was OK to tell me because we were broken up then.

—Steph

Aftermath: After he told me, I beat my disease-infested best friend’s ass. I see him every now and then because he lives up the street from my mom. What an a-hole.


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