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“Farmville”

best of sex

Half way through sex, my boyfriend looked at the clock and said, “Oh crap its 4:25 my crops are going to wither!” and proceeded to go to the computer to harvest his crop on Farmville, an online game.

—Sandra

Aftermath: I left and never went back.

This post was submitted by Sandra.

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“Boozy Kiss”

best of manners

We only see each other when we’re not sober. We made out for the first time and he kept burping his beer breath into his kisses.

—losersloveme

Aftermath: Made him burp the rest out but nothing happened after that.

This post was submitted by losersloveme.

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“Before further use”

chemistry

We were on the phone and I was about to go to bed so I had said, “Goodnight, love you.” He said he had to think about that word before further using it.

—Candice

Aftermath: We ended up breaking up 2 weeks later, due to him being “too confused.” He had a new girlfriend in the next week.

This post was submitted by Candice.

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“Rotting Garbage”

manners

I came home to a lazy, self-righteous prick who had just taken a huge sh*t and my apartment that smelled like rotting garbage. I didn’t know where the smell was coming from until my roommate told me it was him. He was sitting on his worthless ass watching TV and eating all our food.

—Phoebe

Aftermath: I kicked him out, then me and my roommate laughed about him and his rank ass for hours.

This post was submitted by Phoebe.

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“Nibbling”

best of weird

The first time we kissed, she bit my lip. I’m not opposed to nibbling, but she busted it open.

Tony

Aftermath: 15 minutes

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