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“Fool me twice”

clashes

After dating for a year then getting married, we had a hell of a fight and she wound up staying with a (male) friend for a few days. I went to check on her to discover she had moved, with him, across the country.

—Shame On Me

Aftermath: We patched things up, she came home then slept with a coworker (at the office we both worked in) and I sent her on her way. Divorce papers signed.

This post was submitted by Shame On Me.

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“Biker life”

clashes

My ex used to work nights. I worked days. We saw each other long enough to go to fast food to eat. Once he got to work he would text me to argue with me about anything he could pick a fight about. Later on, he’d act like I was the one who started the fights or just totally act like he never texted me.

Biker Chick

Aftermath: This went on for about 2 years (sadly enough, I know) before I finally had enough one night and broke up with him via text. I went to his house, picked up my motorcycle helmet he bought me and left the ring.

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“Farmville”

best of sex

Half way through sex, my boyfriend looked at the clock and said, “Oh crap its 4:25 my crops are going to wither!” and proceeded to go to the computer to harvest his crop on Farmville, an online game.

—Sandra

Aftermath: I left and never went back.

This post was submitted by Sandra.

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“Boozy Kiss”

best of manners

We only see each other when we’re not sober. We made out for the first time and he kept burping his beer breath into his kisses.

—losersloveme

Aftermath: Made him burp the rest out but nothing happened after that.

This post was submitted by losersloveme.

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“Before further use”

chemistry

We were on the phone and I was about to go to bed so I had said, “Goodnight, love you.” He said he had to think about that word before further using it.

—Candice

Aftermath: We ended up breaking up 2 weeks later, due to him being “too confused.” He had a new girlfriend in the next week.

This post was submitted by Candice.

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