best of clashes
We’d been dating about four months, when, during a phone call, she told me that she considered the town I was living in (pop. 7,000) “too big of a city for her” and she wouldn’t live any place “that big” — and her goal in life was to retire from Walmart. I responded along the lines of “You’re joking right?” She hung up on me, and then wouldn’t answer the phone. When I stopped by her house, her mother answered the door saying, “She don’t wanna talk to you, you’ve upset her…”
—Doug
Aftermath: I never saw her face-to-face again, recovered the few items I left at her place and only look back to laugh at how happy I am that I’ve moved on.
best of secrets!
He pretended to be the father of terminally ill child to get a free vacation to Disney World out of the Make-A-Wish Foundation.
—Bobby
Aftermath: It lasted a week while I figured out the best way to break up with him without him wanting to ruin my life with harassment.
best of manners
He had just moved in with me about a month prior and one day while sitting on the couch together watching “The Tudors” on TV, I noticed he was picking at his toes. A few minutes later, I noticed that he was holding something between his thumb and index finger. Before I knew it, he had put the mystery piece in his mouth and about a minute later I heard a crunch sound. “Are you eating your toenail?” I asked. He looked embarrassed when he said, “Yes, it’s a nervous habit of mine.”
—Bethany
Aftermath: We are actually still living together, but not for much longer.
chemistry
It was over when she told me she loved the smell of Axe Body Spray.
—G
Aftermath: Two weeks later, she cheated on me.
clashes
Our relationship was a bit strained from the start, mainly because she liked to smoke weed and steal things from my apartment (which I’d eventually steal back). I was serving my 10th year in the Navy and living outside the base. The one thing I asked of her was to never smoke marijuana in my car. I was driving to work one morning and the military police pulled my car over for a random drug search. I didn’t think anything of it until the drug sniffing dog found her leftovers.
—Tom
Aftermath: Right after work, I confronted her about my “near jail experience.” She couldn’t understand why it was a big deal. She almost flushed my career down the toilet.
