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“How low can he go?”

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We moved into our new place. There were still boxes to unpack when I got a phone call from his girlfriend in another state. He was planning on moving back to be with her and sticking me with the lease. Turns out he gave us the same Valentine’s gift, mailing hers from his mom’s house.

— Last to Know

Aftermath: I moved out that night, sticking him with the lease. She dumped him too.

This post was submitted by Last to Know.

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“To See What it was Like”

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My boyfriend called to tell me he kissed a man on the roof of a NYC building because he wanted “to see what it was like” but that it didn’t count as cheating…I was pretty sure kissing someone who was not me was cheating.

— Leche

Aftermath: Somehow I stayed with him for a few more months. After we broke up, he tried to be my friend. I refused.

This post was submitted by Leche.

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“Pawn Stars”

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He popped the question with a ring that he purchased from a pawn shop.

— Tanya

Aftermath: Once I found out, we broke up. He continued to lie unconvincingly about having a brain tumor. I pawned the ring for the top-dollar price of fifty bucks.

This post was submitted by Tanya .

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“Jesus is Watching”

best of sex

I can’t decide…When we were having sex and he pulled out, threw on his clothes and said “We can’t do this, Jesus is watching,” or when he told me we could never hang out on Sundays because that’s when his “Magic the Gathering” card club met.

— Red Balloon

Aftermath: He broke up with me about a week after the sex incident, saying we were “going too fast” and that he needed to be more mature for his mother.

This post was submitted by Red Balloon.

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“Barney or Fred?”

best of weird

She “attempted” suicide by eating two more than the recommended dosage of aspirin…

— Luis

Aftermath: Played along with it and talked her down until she agreed that suicide wasn’t the answer. Was worried she might try it again with a harsher drug…like Flinstones chewable vitamins.

This post was submitted by Luis.

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