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“Hemorrhoids?”

sex weird

My new girlfriend, a gorgeous Eurasian Filipina, and I  jumped into bed for a steamy session. I did a reach around to grab her butt, and to my horror, I felt either hemorrhoids or she had shat herself. My d*ck shrank, and I dismounted and sent her home.

Fila

Aftermath: Over at once

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“Courtship come-again”

manners

He was my crush in high school. Then he courted me, but I didn’t give him my permission yet. Then, he left…without a word. After two years, he came back and asked for my hand again. But then, I already had someone else.

—A.A.

Aftermath: I then said “yes” but broke up seven days after.

 

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“Spitter”

best of manners sex

It was over when he came in my mouth—by mistake, and I spat it back in his face—intentionally.

—Angela

Aftermath: He hit me in the face with his penis and now I swallow all the time.

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32
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“Waiter/Informer”

secrets!

It was over when I got a text message from my best friend, who was the waiter at a restaurant my boyfriend was at, saying that he was eating dinner with his ex-girlfriend. He told me he was going to be with his mom all day.

Jukedd

Aftermath: We broke up a few months later. I saw text messages in his phone between the two. But she left him for someone else! Karma rocks.

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12
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“Downhill run”

chemistry clashes

She told me she ran 10 miles a day and she still wasn’t that thin. I knew it was all downhill when she really “let herself go.”

Andre

Aftermath: About two more weeks.

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