“Dear Subscriber”
I was out of town for a close family members funeral and he wrote me: “Dear subscriber, I know you’ve been out of town, but your sex balance is past due.. Your account will reach virginity status… Please f*ck to avoid disconnection. Thank you. ^-^”
—Kyya
Aftermath: That was his sympathy… I think that was definitely it, when I knew what we had built our relationship on.
It’d be totally cute if someone hadn’t just died.