“Four Years to Make a Man”

best of secrets!

Year one: We diet and go to the gym together.
Year two: He gets plastic surgery from all the weight he lost from year one.
Year three: He is happier and I push him for a new job, while I start house hunting.
Year four: I buy him a laptop for X-mas and put the down payment on his new car.
Year five: My skinny, good looking boyfriend uses his laptop to find a new girlfriend that he impresses with his new car and three-flat financial investment.


Aftermath: I am living with a new boyfriend that I don’t have to buy a thing for and I am the happiest I have been in five years. Lesson learned.

This post was submitted by Monika.

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“Identity Theft”

best of secrets!

I’d been dating David for about 6 months and we were about to embark on a 3-week vacation with our dogs. A couple days prior to departure, his brother—DAVID—calls me. Turns out, while he was overseas on a work assignment, his brother (the David I was dating) was “house sitting.” Basically, everything I knew was really part of the overseas brother’s life and identity.


Aftermath: The real David had the fake David committed to the local mental hospital upon returning home. He only found out about me from one of his neighbors, which led him to search for my number and call. The three of us had one visit together the night before vacation. Next day, I went on to Montana by myself with my dog and was totally over this chapter after an hour on the road.

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“After Prom”

best of secrets!

My girlfriend and I met up at an “after prom” party, got drunk, and ultimately ending up having sex. What I didn’t know was that she had cheated on me, with her ex, before she went home to change and he didn’t wear a condom. She denied it, even with her best friends siding with me.


Aftermath: We still talk here and there, and still “have feelings for each other” but nothing has amounted ever since the incident.

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She finally had sex with me after weeks of just handjobs, and we lived together! I flipped her into a position where I saw straight up her nose, which was full of coke.


Aftermath: Stayed with her long enough for her to leave me for someone she met on the Internet. She’s basically homeless now.

This post was submitted by jerbear.

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“Pot smoking loser”


I dated him for about 8 months, then he told me he never loved me.


Aftermath: He lived with mommy and daddy, smoked too much, the sex was bad, and drove mommy and daddy’s vehicle. He was a loser anyway!

This post was submitted by blaqwynter.

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