“Out Of The Closet????”

best of weird

One evening she invites me over for dinner. The evening was quite romantic, so she wanted to take it a step further. After messing around in the living room, we moved to the bedroom. As we proceeded to make love I noticed the closet door was opening. To my shock, her 13-year-old brother was sitting in the closet watching and eating a tub of popcorn!! When I freaked out she told me, “It’s OK I always let him watch!”


Aftermath: Needless to say I was out of there and never heard from her again. Thank God!!

This post was submitted by Chris.


“Time to get a dog?”


Went on two dates with her…just after we had sex, she rolled over and said, “Honey, I think we should get a dog.”


Aftermath: She got her dog…by herself…

This post was submitted by johnnyV.


““…and this is what I do for a living.””


My date took me to his place of employment. It was there I discovered this 28-year-old man DJs at a college bar, while obscenely groping a blow-up doll, pouring watered-down hooch down girls’ throats, wearing graphic t-shirts, and screaming, “Who wants to get laid tonight??!!” I discovered this was also his 30-year plan. Yikes.


Aftermath: I, surprisingly, did not want to get laid that night. I did, however, take advantage of the open tab that was provided to me.

This post was submitted by Michelle .


“No forwarding address”


I had been seeing her for about 2 weeks. That night we sealed the deal for the first time, and she left my house around 4am. My roomate woke me up at 7am to tell me I had company…It was the girl and her mother! She wanted to meet her new son-in-law!


Aftermath: I moved about a month later…no forwarding address!

This post was submitted by Incognito.


“Night Terrors”


Came home one evening to be with my girl Jill. She left me later that night because I woke up screaming.

—Some Guy

Aftermath: I wish I didn’t lose my right hand by cutting it off during my sleep. (Joke obviously)

This post was submitted by Some Guy.