He told me that he’s too busy for a girlfriend and all my “needs”. I can stick around and he will support me financially but not to expect much else for at least the next couple years until he gets his business running smoothly.

—ApparentlyARoommate

Aftermath: Still trying to figure out how to extradite myself. I work in one of his businesses. Leaving him means being homeless AND jobless.

My best friend took my virginity. We were secretly a couple for the next five months. He texted me saying he wanted to take a break. Three days later he drunk dialed me to tell me it was over, he loved me, but wanted to f*ck this hot chick at his gym.

—Plan-B

Aftermath: We are still best friends but I am still in love with him. I hate the fugly pig whore from the gym who is now his girlfriend. He tells me he loves me every day.

After dating her a couple weeks I was driving her home for the first time. As I pulled into her driveway I saw her GIRLFRIEND running at me with a baseball bat. Guess she wasn’t up for a three-way.

—Brody

Aftermath: I heard her girlfriend dumped her and she gained 40 pounds. Maybe she should have stuck with dudes.

We were in a three year on-again, off-again relationship that went from engagement to genuine public animosity and back, punctuated with booty calls and jealousy. One night after sex at my place she began crying and wouldn’t tell me why, then abruptly left. The next morning she called and said she’d been seeing this guy and thinks she might be in love.

—Herve

Aftermath: She called intermittently after that; a week later to tell me that I’d better get tested for STD’s; a month later to tell me that she’d been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder; three months later to tell me that she was engaged. I eventually changed my number. She was married within six months of that night at my place.

We were at a bar with friends. A young, attractive French man was showing interest in me. Later that night, when I asked my boyfriend if the incident made him jealous, he looked me in the eyes, and, with all seriousness replied, “No.”

—Jennie

Aftermath: Hint taken. Thanks for being blunt.