He gave me a mix tape with some retarded Boyz II Men song on it because all girls like Boyz II Men. Then he put on “Don’t Cry” by Guns n’ Roses but apologized, on the tape, because it might be too heavy. I thought, “Does this guy does know me at all?” I think he would have spontaneously combusted if I told him I wished he put the Violent Femmes on it instead.

—Cindy

Aftermath: He went back to where he came from across the country and, thank god, things fizzled on their own.

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