One fateful night, missionary style, the condom broke within a few pumps. I reared back to put on a new one, and it hit me. The most awful smell my nose had ever experienced. This was new, and I uncontrollably went limp. She asked what happened, and too nice to say it, I told her I had an E.D. type of disorder

—Bukowski

Aftermath: I went and got an STD check, fearing she had a rare dead animal disease. I was clean, we never had sex again, and she told friends I go limp easily. Nice guys finish last!

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