“Not the Baby Daddy”


Before leaving for college my girlfriend and I decided to keep dating exclusively while apart. At Thanksgiving break, she came home and asked me to assist her with an abortion from a pregnancy conceived away at college…

— Bill

Aftermath: I went with her to the clinic and was harassed by the staff on how I could have prevented this if I was more responsible. I never spoke to her again.

This post was submitted by Bill .


“Oh, by the way…”


She broke it off after 6 years. We saw each other off and on for a year. Two weeks later she tells me she’s dating someone. Two months later she tells me she loves me and always will. Then out of the blue she calls and tells me she’s getting married. *Insert drinking* She calls me four days later and says…“Oh and I’m pregnant.”

— Kevin

Aftermath: I’m selling the engagement ring (I held on to it) and when I do, Vegas Baby!

This post was submitted by Kevin.

Comments Off on Oh, by the way…

“I married a Witch”

best of clashes

After six years of marriage, two of which saw me as an associate pastor, she announced that she is, and had been a practicing Wiccan, complete with a witch name and a regularly scheduled meeting place for her coven.

— cluelessinohio

Aftermath: Three years after our divorce, my girlfriend cut her finger and joked that “maybe there’s a curse on me!”

This post was submitted by cluelessinohio.


“The Final Hour”


I was called to the nursing home because my Grammy was fading quickly. He knew where I was going and why. Because I needed him, I tried for about 45 minutes to reach him on his cell. He was supposed to be at home with the dog. No luck. When I finally got home I found him passed out drunk at the bottom of a bottle of Crown Royal.

— Gabby

Aftermath: We’re divorced. I got the dog.

This post was submitted by Gabby.

Comments Off on The Final Hour

“I don’t”

best of clashes

I decided to do the most romantic thing I could think of for our 20th anniversary – a surprise wedding renewal. Friends and relatives from all over the country attended. I proposed on one knee in front of everyone, told her I loved her, and renewed our vows. Everyone cried … everyone but her.

After we got home from the service she said, “How DARE you do something like this??? Don’t SPEAK to me again.”

— WV Jim

Aftermath: It took me 11 more years, but I finally asked her for a divorce. Oddly enough, we now get along better than we ever have.

This post was submitted by WV Jim.

Comments Off on I don’t