best of secrets!
I placed a fake ad on the personals page of a local paper pretending to be exactly the kind of guy I thought she’d like. The ad only got one response, and it was from my wife.
—Dave
Aftermath: I got custody of the kids and am happily remarried. She can’t seem to keep anything steady in her life (job, men, etc.) for more than a few months.
This post was submitted by Dave.
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secrets!
My girlfriend had always complained that I never stopped by during the week to see her (she lived with her parents). So, one day, I was in her neighborhood and her mom answered, but wouldn’t let me in. My girlfriend came to the door and asks what I was doing. It took a few seconds but I figured out what was going on and walked toward my car. She ran after me telling me that he was just a friend.
—Rick
Postscript: Her mom later told me she had been seeing both of us; neither one of us knew about the other. We didn’t see each other for about a year, got back together for about a year, then went our separate ways. She was beautiful, I miss her.
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clashes
My drunk boyfriend called and woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me he took my car and to not get mad but he totaled it. Then a girl gets on the phone to tell me he feels really bad…… Hmmm who the hell is this girl? And to top it off it was going to be paid off in 3 months.
— Shelly
Aftermath: The insurance only gave me $12,000 so now I’m driving a Toyota Camry. I’m saving up to buy another Mercedes.
This post was submitted by Shelly.
2
best of weird
I knew it was over when boyfriend of 7 years came home from work and asked me: If I was to die, could he have me stuffed and mounted? He had the nerve to ask if he could drive me to the notary.
—No Stuffed Turkey
Postscript: No wonder he had all them mannequins.
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best of weird
I came home one evening and found him wandering around in my apartment complex parking lot and wearing my shorts. When I stepped into my apartment, he had candles lit and some of my pictures on the walls were upside down. He told me he was performing an exorcism to get rid my demons.
—Patty
Aftermath: I knew it was over and changed my locks.
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