“Elton John”

best of clashes

During a phone conversation, I mentioned I was going to see Elton John with my siblings. He made an anti-gay remark which I, at first, thought was a joke. He then proceeded to get angry and go on an anti-gay rant. When I told him that I had several gay friends and was pro-gay rights and that I tried to explain things to my young daughter so she would be tolerant, he told me he thought less of me as a person and said maybe I should start taking my daughter to church.


Aftermath: I hung up on him. He proceeded to call me or have his friend call me for days. I didn’t answer. I’m now happily married—to someone else.

This post was submitted by MH.

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“I’ll Pass”

best of sex

He suggested we have sex and I agreed if he had protection. He stands up, digs through his laundry hamper and pulls out a condom that’s already been opened and unrolled.


Aftermath: I never slept with him, though we continued seeing each other for a month because I felt bad.

This post was submitted by Allison.

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“The Others”

best of weird

We were cuddling on his couch watching The Others and he said…“I could keep you here forever!” It was our first date…


Aftermath: He called me the next Saturday over a dozen times and I ignored him. He finally gave up.

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“Ask the Cat”

best of chemistry

It was over when he asked his cats what I wanted to do that day. In a doggy voice.

—Mizz Gooch

Aftermath: I f***ing hate cats. Only later did I find out that he named one of his cats after his favorite porn star.

This post was submitted by Mizz Gooch.

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“Sex Drive”

best of sex

I was going down on this girl, working pretty hard, and all of a sudden she says, totally deadpan, “I would really be enjoying this if my medication didn’t kill my sex drive.”


Aftermath: I finished the deed that night, but broke off contact shortly thereafter.

This post was submitted by Tom.

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