“Left hook”

best of clashes

The last thing I told her was, “You have a beautiful left hook.” She liked to get drunk and argue…about nothing!!


Aftermath: This was at the end of our few months together.

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“Best in Show”


I dated this girl for about a month. Very nice, great body, a sweet girl. I was watching the TV late one night and started watching the dog show comedy “Best in Show.” My new girl looked way too much like the rich, lesbian, dog-owner lady. Way too much like her. Disturbing! That was it, that was all I would see from then on.


Aftermath: I couldn’t even look at her anymore . I told her it was over a nicely as I could about a week later.

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“In my friend’s Nissan”


She threw up in my friend’s Nissan a block away from her apartment. She was drunk.


Aftermath: It was over after I carried her to the door. I never saw her again, but the throw up stain is a reminder of that dreadful night.

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“Do we have sex?”


We had been dating for a few weeks and were making out on his couch. Things were getting pretty intense and suddenly he stopped, looked at me and asked, “Now what do we do? Do we have sex? Because we can…my bedroom is right there.” I was instantly turned off. I need a man with confidence and a take—charge attitude. About five minutes later I thanked him for making things awkward and then left.


Aftermath: After telling some friends about it I was convinced to give him a chance to redeem himself. We went out on a couple more dates but I was completely repulsed by him after that.

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“A spot on the bed”


We both looked at a spot on the edge of the bed and realized that he had left poo skid marks. Neither of us discussed it. He left in a hurry.


Aftermath: He actually ended it a couple weeks later and got lots of nicknames from my friends. Favorite lines: “Wow. You really f*cked the sh*t out of him.” and “What an a**hole!”

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