sex

 

“The Devil Inside”

best of sex

One night just before having sex, my girlfriend started slapping me and pulling my hair all the time yelling at me that I was the Devil.

— Vince

Aftermath: I never saw her again.

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“Gang Bang”

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She told that she was involved in a gang bang.

— squid

Aftermath: Thank God we were only dating for two weeks.

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“You Know You Want This”

sex

He took off his pants to reveal what can only be described as a butt plug for a penis. Extremely small and yet super thick. As I was looking at his pink eraser he says to me “You know you want this.”

— bluebird

Aftermath: I never saw him again. My friends and I still refer to him as “Eraser.”

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“But I’m Naked…”

sex

I stood in front of him naked. He looked at me, told me to get dressed, and went back to whatever game it was he was playing on the computer.

— Donna

Aftermath: I’m much happier now with someone else.


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“Wham Bam Thank You Sir”

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Ten minutes into sex she says, “Why haven’t you cum yet?” I said, “Because I don’t want to yet.” She shouted, “YOU MEAN YOU’RE DOING IT ON PURPOSE! I’m not the kind of woman who likes being here all night.”

— Smooth

Aftermath: We broke up. It wasn’t worth taking my clothes off for two minutes.

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