After dating for awhile, her boss met me at a party and liked me better. He started asking her to get my advice on things. She lost her limelight to me. I knew it was over when she asked me to delete “certain things” we had done on video.
—Science
Aftermath: We slept together one more time after the break up just because it was always wild. Not heard from her since.
He giggled after sex. And not just a little, it was pretty hearty giggling like someone just told the funniest damn joke…and it last for about 5 minutes. It was some kind of “tick” that he had. He couldn’t control it and it happened to him every time.
—No Sense of Humor
Aftermath: I tried to give it a shot, he was a nice guy & I didn’t want to be shallow. But I couldn’t take it. A couple weeks & few more “giggle” sessions later, I stopped responding. It was just too weird!
So I got drunk and f***ed this guy on our second date. He kept telling me he loved me and tried to get me to tell him I loved him, which was a bonerkiller like you would not believe. I had to threaten to put my pants on and go home before he would shut up. Right after we finished, he asked “Wasn’t that the best orgasm you’ve ever had?” I was irritated enough to answer, truthfully, that it had not been, at which point he got really pouty.
—Amelie
Aftermath: Immediately started avoiding the hell out of him, although he continued to drunk-dial for almost a year. Wow, seeing this in writing makes me way more embarrassed about this.
We argued for an hour about anal sex. Apparently this was a favorite endeavor of his and his ex-girlfriend and he was insistent that I engage in this act as well.
—Lee-Lee
Aftermath: Two weeks later I went by his house at 3:30 a.m. and found his ex-girlfriend’s car parked outside.
Everything was going fine until she gained about 25-lbs. I was willing to go with it, until she started complaining about how said weight made her look fat. Near the end, she was literally crushing my goods when she was on top. I should have won an Oscar for those performances.
—AznInvasion2k
Aftermath: The relationship lasted for another 5 lbs, then I was in actual fear that I would lose my ability to procreate through the constant abuse.
