sex

 

“Not Nancy”

best of sex

It was over when he called me “Nancy” in bed. Nancy is not my name. It’s my mother’s.

—Not Nancy

Aftermath: It was also his ex-girlfriend’s name. I broke up with him soon after, for less creepy reasons.


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“Sleepyhead”

best of sex

It was over when I fell asleep during the three-way.

—Anonymous

Aftermath: More sleeping.

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“Nibble nibble”

sex

One day she was teasing me by trying to nibble on my d*ck through my boxers. She was successful. Upon going to the bathroom, I realized she broke a blood vessel. I told her she had to drop everything and leave.

—Deacon

Aftermath: 2 years later I still see her everyday and we are good friends…She has no idea what she did.

This post was submitted by DEACON.

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“New girl in school”

manners sex

I thought I’d show around the new girl in school. Needless to say she called me a short time later, and we were messing around but I had no condom so she proceeded to give me the best BJ known to man. Afterwards, I made the mistake of telling a friend, who told her, “I hear you suck good.” Great line…

—Robert

Aftermath: She told me that my friend ruined all chances for me in trying to experience her greatly aquired skills for himself. Afterwards she was passed around the school, and I kinda felt lucky I was first in line. BTW STD FREE :)

This post was submitted by robert.

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“World of Warcraft”

quirks sex

After many months of unsatisyfying, infrequent sex because he had almost zero sex drive, I found him masturbating while having cyber sex with another character on World of Warcraft. This was after almost 3 months of no sex because he “wasn’t interested”.

—Amethyst

Aftermath: Meet another man who’s now my husband that doesn’t trade real women for pixellated ones (that are probably played by men anyway).

This post was submitted by Amethyst.


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