“ABBA and Liza”

best of secrets!

I couldn’t believe I had found a guy who shared my appreciation of ABBA and Liza Minnelli…until he told me “I’m not straight, but don’t worry, I don’t actually want to sleep with guys.”


Aftermath: He lost his beard that day. He still can’t understand why I won’t just look past his orientation.

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“Pre-med rapper”

best of secrets!

My boyfriend was a self-proclaimed “rapper” and a medical student. He only wrote me one song in our whole relationship. On top of the crappy lyrics of this song, half way through it, he described how he cheated on me. He then posted this song on Facebook.


Aftermath: It was over at that point. He said he hoped we would be friends, that our children could know each other. Why would I want my kids to know someone like that?

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best of secrets!

When I heard him snorting up in the bathroom. Later in the relationship, he got mad at me because I didn’t set up an appointment for him to start seeing a drug counselor. (He was driving freight trucks and sitting on his ass for hours waiting and doing nothing, but I was supposed to set up an appointment for him while I was at my office job. Yeah, right.)


Aftermath: It was way too long for me to realize he wasn’t going to give it up, but I am gladly away from that now.

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How did I know it was over? When he FaceBook’d someone else, talking about the kisses they had shared.


Aftermath: I’m contemplating on how I’m gonna break it to him as I type.

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“Breathing quickened”


I was engaged to a man who lived in a different state. He called me every night when he got home from work. One night, it was getting very late and he hadn’t yet called, nor was he answering his phone. Around 2 a.m., he finally answered and sounded very odd. He kept trying to get off the phone, but I demanded to know what was up. Finally, his breathing quickened and became erratic and he stopped talking to me. I knew he had another woman there and she was…well you can imagine.

—Bullet Dodger

Aftermath: He confirmed my suspicions the following morning & begged me to forgive him. I dumped him immediately & now couldn’t be happier he cheated on me. It saved me from marrying a philandering creep.