clashes

 

“Marijuana”

clashes

Our relationship was a bit strained from the start, mainly because she liked to smoke weed and steal things from my apartment (which I’d eventually steal back). I was serving my 10th year in the Navy and living outside the base. The one thing I asked of her was to never smoke marijuana in my car. I was driving to work one morning and the military police pulled my car over for a random drug search. I didn’t think anything of it until the drug sniffing dog found her leftovers.

—Tom

Aftermath: Right after work, I confronted her about my “near jail experience.” She couldn’t understand why it was a big deal. She almost flushed my career down the toilet.

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“Knee-jerk jingoism”

best of clashes

He forced me to fly an American flag from the driver’s side window of our car after 9/11. It started falling into the street when I would accidentally open the window for air. On the day I refused to dart into traffic again to retrieve it, I think we both realized it was over.

—Molly

Aftermath: I endured the knee-jerk, 9/11-induced jingoism and “patriotism” for a while. But our divorce was finalized three years later.


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“Left hook”

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The last thing I told her was, “You have a beautiful left hook.” She liked to get drunk and argue…about nothing!!

—Mel

Aftermath: This was at the end of our few months together.


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“Glad it isn’t me”

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I knew it was over when she said she was going to Afghanistan and all I could think of was, “Glad it isn’t me.”

–Alex

Aftermath: She’s still there. HA! And I’m still happy not being there.


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“Started a vicious fight”

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My first serious relationship was with a Canadian man. Ours was a long-distance affair, and I only actually “saw” him occasionally. When we were together, I’d try to make up for lost time by absorbing every gesture, look and quirk about him. One day I good-naturedly joked with him because his accent caused him to pronounce bagels as “bag-uls,” which I found very endearing. Unfortunately, he did NOT find this amusing in any way, and started a vicious fight that resulted in me crying in the car. Strangely enough, this didn’t concern him, but pointing out his interpretation of ‘bag-uls’ certainly struck a chord.

—Caitlin

Aftermath: The relationship lasted off and on for about 3 ½ years and ended shortly after bagel fiasco.


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