“Before further use”


We were on the phone and I was about to go to bed so I had said, “Goodnight, love you.” He said he had to think about that word before further using it.


Aftermath: We ended up breaking up 2 weeks later, due to him being “too confused.” He had a new girlfriend in the next week.

This post was submitted by Candice.

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“Green Eyes”

best of chemistry

One day, casually sitting next to me on the couch, he looks over and says, “You know, you’d be perfect…with green eyes.”


Aftermath: We stayed together a year and a half, to two years. The comment was made pretty early on, but it stuck with me through the end. Crazy as it sounds, my eye color should not be that important to him.

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“Aspirin Kiss”

best of chemistry

We broke up when he told me I “tasted like aspirin when we kissed.”


Aftermath: It was our sophomore year in high school. I should have known he was a jerk when he broke up with his girlfriend for me.

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“Bright Orange”

best of chemistry

I met this guy while drunk, kissed him and made plans to meet him the next day. When I saw him the next day, he was wearing Oakley sunglasses with bright orange lenses and jeans that were too short and too tight.


Aftermath: He left town right after we met again. Though I told him I would look him up again, we only exchanged awkward instant messages afterward.

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“Cool Date”


On a trip out of town without him, I went to the best restaurant of my entire life. I wanted to share the experience with him, so I bought plane tickets to fly two hours to the restaurant, eat and come home that night as a cool date. He said he couldn’t because he needed to golf.


Aftermath: Still working on the best way to break up…we have a dog.

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