chemistry

 

“Don’t s*** where you eat”

best of chemistry

I prepared a nice meal for my husband. He was hungry but also had to poop. So, he took his plate into the bathroom and ate it while he was pooping. To this day I cannot eat ham.

— Michelle

Aftermath: Divorce.

This post was submitted by Michelle.


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“Knitting in Sin City”

chemistry

I took her on vacation to Las Vegas. She refused to do anything but sit in the room and knit. The gambling, drinking, and smoking depressed her. I don’t know what she was expecting.

— Stig

Aftermath: I broke up with her.

This post was submitted by Stig.


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“Wendy’s then?”

chemistry clashes

She told me that she was going to fart in front of me at a McDonald’s.

— kyle

Aftermath: We didn’t go to McDonald’s.

This post was submitted by ky le.


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“It’s the thought that counts”

chemistry

He went to Nicaragua and brought me a REAL petrified alligator leaning against a pole, lacquered and smoking a pipe.

— Lisa

Aftermath: Taxidermy does not a good gift make.

This post was submitted by Lisa.

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“Love Triangle”

chemistry

I went to her place for dinner. After listening to her trash her own ethnic group, another girl walked in dressed to kill. Was this going to be a double date ? No. I soon realized they were fighting because they had a date with each other.

— fastfreddie

Aftermath: Not knowing if she liked herself was enough but not knowing which sex she liked was too much.

This post was submitted by fastfreddie.


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