“I take it back”


After a year of dating I finally told him I loved him, he said “Why did you say that to me?”

— LittleE

Aftermath: I dumped him and told him I was ready for someone who was emotionally ready for me.

This post was submitted by LittleE.

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“Nothing but the tooth”


She came from a dentist appointment and said, “The dentist said eventually I’m going to lose all my teeth. You should decide now if you can deal with that.”

— acidbrat

Aftermath: I broke up with her a month later, not because of her imminent dental demise, but because she was a soul-sucking psycho. No word on whether or not she still has teeth.

This post was submitted by acidbrat.


“Almost Perfect”


I dropped him off at his house and instead of saying goodbye he said “You know, you’re 99.9% perfect for me but you’re not from Prairie Village.”

— LilBritches

Aftermath: I couldn’t be more excited to be from elsewhere…

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“Space Cadet”


I commented on the experience that I had working on the Space Shuttle recovery mission in 2003. She had no idea that a shuttle had ever crashed.

— Mike

Aftermath: I lost her number.

This post was submitted by Mike.

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“I’m sorry…what?”

best of chemistry manners

On our first date, during dinner, he asked me if I was into anal sex.

— Kly

Aftermath: I told him I didn’t think it was going to work out.

This post was submitted by Kly.

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