best-of

 

“Imperfect Match”

best of chemistry

Met a guy on a dating site. One night he slept over – I woke up at 2:30 am to a blaring TV and no guy. I called him: “Where’d you go?” “To a buddy’s.” “Why’d you just leave in the middle of the night?” “Well I left a note.”

Reading the note, it stated how we were an “imperfect MATCH.” Classic.

— Drea

Aftermath: He called me a few days later, but I never spoke to him again.

This post was submitted by Drea.


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“Baby Food”

best of quirks secrets!

One night on the phone she started telling me about all her little “quirks.” It was so boring I stopped listening. I tuned back in to her monologue just in time to hear her say that she likes to eat baby food. Ugh! You heard right, baby food. As in little jars. As in Gerber….

—Spike

Aftermath: She eventually stopped calling me.

This post was submitted by Spike.

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“Text-pal”

best of manners

Went out to dinner with an old girlfriend. Up front, I asked if she was seeing anyone. She replied, “No.” After dinner, we went back to my place to watch a movie. She had been rudely texting most of the evening thru dinner and our conversations…so I was curious at this “text-pal.” I maneuvered to give her a shoulder massage and looked onto her phone and discovered explicit texts to some guy.

—Christine

Aftermath: Movie concluded. I drove her home and she asked why I didn’t invite her to stay the night…

This post was submitted by Christine.


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“Danglers”

best of sex

He asked me if I wanted to lick on his danglers while another guy rammed him in his backside (NOT the words he used!).

—EssCee

Aftermath: HIV test.

This post was submitted by EssCee.


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“Next”

best of weird

I had just arrived to pick her up for our first date when her little boy ran over to me and said, “My mom says you are going to be my next dad.” Yes, he said, “Next.” We went out that night and never again.

—Dace

Aftermath: I ran into her a year or so later and found out she had gotten married but was getting a divorce, after only a year. Her kid’s new daddy number 4.

This post was submitted by Dace.


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