“I watched in horror”

best of manners

Having recently consummated a shiny new romance, I was cuddling on the couch with my new girlfriend. We were wrapped up in her comforter on the couch, watching TV and eating one of those giant chocolate bars. As her hands got smeared with melting chocolate, I watched in horror as she wiped her fingers on the edge of the blanket, then calmly folded over the chocolate-covered corner. I knew it wasn’t going to work right there.

—Rob

Aftermath: The relationship lasted for 6 months, off and on.

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